There’s a common misconception amongst society that therapy has to be this clinical, very formal exchange, where we both sit up straight and the therapist uses language that feels more confusing than helpful. That’s never been my style, i don't have the posture to sit up straight even if i wanted too and am a really Scouse working-class therapist so clinical language just isn't in my vocabulary. So to settle some pre-session anxieties, here is a list of things you can officially stop worrying about when we work together.

1. Your "Unfiltered" Language

If the only way to describe your week is to say it was a "total shitshow," then say it. If you need to swear, use slang, or describe a situation in a way that isn't "polite," then go for it. You don't need to find the "professional" or "polished" word for your experience. I swear A LOT too when i express myself, which you will notice when you work with me.

2. The "TMI" Factor

Think you’re sharing "too much"? In this room, there’s no such thing. There is nothing (yet) i have not heard. Whether it’s sexual health, intrusive thoughts, something gave you the ICK, lets talk about it. You don’t have to filter the "embarrassing" bits or worry about shocking me. I’ve heard it, I’m trained for it, and I promise you aren't "weird."

3. Your "Aesthetic"

Bedhead? Still in your Pjs? Came from the gym? Still under the duvet? Perfect. I care about your comfort, not how you look. If you feel safest in an oversized hoodie, then that is exactly how you should show up. This isn't a job interview; i honestly don't give. a shit what you wear.

4. Correcting Me

 If I summarise your feelings and I get it wrong, tell me. If I’ve misunderstood a detail, got your pets name wrong or completely missed the mark on an insight, call me out. I don’t have an ego about being "the expert" you are the expert on you, because sometimes i do get it wrong because am human too.

5. Life’s Little Interruptions

We are humans living real, messy lives. If your cat walks across the keyboard, dog wont stop barking, you suddenly realise you’re about to burst because you forgot to have a wee, or the worst a parcel comes at the most inconvenient time for you, just say it! I’d much rather you be comfortable than sitting there distracted debating weather to say something to me or not and trust me if am working from home my dog loves to make a appearance in sessions.

6. Messy Emotions

You don't need to apologise for crying, for getting angry, or for losing your train of thought. You aren't "too much," and you aren't "a mess." You're just being honest. There is no "right" way to have an emotion. I have AuDHD so trust me i get it my emotions can be messy at times.

7. Repeating Yourself

Healing isn't a linear straight line (however much we wish it was). If we talk about the same breakup for ten sessions in a row, or you tell me the same story every week, that’s okay. We talk about it until it doesn't need to be talked about anymore. No apologies necessary for repeating yourself.

8. Jumping Topics

This is particularly important for my neurospicy clients (because i know my ADHD brain can go off in some wild directions). Did we start talking about your parents and end up talking about something completely different? Have you got so many things to get off your chest? Sometimes the off topic moments are exactly where the breakthrough is hiding. We go where your brain needs to go. This doesn't mean ill let you go off on a complete tangent or down rabbit hole where its no longer therapeutic, its about a balance of trusting your process in being non-directive, empathetic and non-judgemental but also staying attuned to our work and gently guiding us back when needed.

You don’t have to perform for me. Just show up as you are messy, loud, tired, or repetitive. That’s the version of you that gets the work done.